Bittersweet Chalkolate

Blog about cooking, teaching, and everything else that is my life.

May. Purging challenge. Day 5.

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The first year of Maya’s life is such a blur to me and yet some moments stand out so clearly.

I remember bringing her home. I remember how the second night she wouldn’t go to sleep and she was crying and hiccuping and I was very anxious as I had no idea what to do. I remember the relief I had when my mom came. I remember not having enough milk to pump and sending Martin to the drug store at 2 am to buy formula. I remember the first time I gave her roasted sweet potato. She ate one tiny bite and that made me happy. I remember how much she hated being in a stroller. I remember..

I remember a lot of things. They came back when I found her old bibs, some of them with stains, some torn. She never really liked them and would always pull them off as soon as she could.

purging 5

My baby is growing. I do not want to forget giving her her first bath. I do not want to forget waking up almost every hour. As difficult as it was, it was an experience of a lifetime and it continues to be so. I will keep one bib just so one day I can give it to her. As this is what my mom did. And we can sit all night talking. Just like my mom and I when she was here helping me with Maya. And so I will tell Maya about hiccups and the stroller and the sleepless nights. I am so ever thankful to my mom for the toys and clothes that she saved. And I will think of her when I am talking with Maya. And probably I will cry as you truly understand your mom only when you have a child of your own.

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