Bittersweet Chalkolate

Blog about cooking, teaching, and everything else that is my life.

January. Conflict resolution seminar. Day 18.

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Two small person

Have ever gone to watch baseball when you hate baseball? Have you ever gone shopping when you actually hate shopping malls? Have you agreed to work overtime when you had other plans? Have you done something only because you didn’t want to disappoint the other party involved?

If the answer is yes then you are familiar with another conflict resolution strategy – smoothing.

Smoothing is the complete opposite of forcing. We choose this strategy when our relationship is much more important than our goal. We also use this strategy when we see that the opponent stands their ground and will not give in. Smoothing is considered to be a short term solution to the problem and often offers only temporary relief if used in a re-occurring conflict. It is a win-lose strategy so even though it allows to relieve some stress, it is not too too helpful in the long run.

Focusing on the relationship alone and forgetting about your goals might lead to very serious frustration and tension which is not very good for the relationship. Aaaaaaand we have just come back to where we started.

Pick and choose your battles. What is more important – your goal or your relationship? Can you let this conflict go? Are you ready to fight for your beliefs in this situation?

We will talk more tomorrow. I am exhausted now and going to bed.


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